September 13, 2005

Spoon and Fork Please!

Growing up in the Philippines, I was so familiar with the typical dining set up at home a plate, spoon and fork , bowl of rice, viand or "ulam" and a glass of water ( on special occasions coke).We were a normal remote happy family who all skipped breakfast or maybe eat a piece or two of pandesal with coffee and then have a hearthy lunch and dinner. Being in this kind of set up I underestimated the use ofthe knife! For some bizaare reason, we seldom have a knife set up in our dining table and I never asked my parents why. I looked in the cupboards and see that my mom has the whole set of cutleries but the star of the dining table was always the spoon and fork. I figured with my little mind then that the knives were only used for special occasions.

Then things got complicated, I went to hotel school and learned that there were more to the family of the Spoon and Fork. From the spoon alone there's the soup spoon, dinner spoon, dessert spoon, teaspoon, demi spoons to start with. Then I had to learn the rest of the itsy bitsy relatives of the fork and the knife plus the plates and the different kinds of glasses ( heck I only knew the water glass and the coffee cups we used at home).This is where I was introduced to the array of choices one has to make in wining and dining. Oddly enough, when I eat at home, we still have the same spoon and fork set up. I was thinking, how would I eat rice without the spoon?

The first years of marriage are the discovery years and true enough you still find something out about your partner no matter how long you've been together before getting married. One night, my husband and I were about to eat dinner when he made a comment.. " Babe, I'm not Filipino, I don't use spoon and fork for dinner. I need the knife!" Then I realized that old habits are hard to break. Here I am with all my knowledge on food and beverage still setting up the same spoon and fork my mom used to set up at home! Is this a Filipino thing? what is it with Pinoys eating with spoon and fork? I am pretty sure the knives are of help and serve their purpose but we just don't use them enough, do we? Or is it a French thing to have a complete set of cutleries and dine in complete style from aperitif with a few glasses of pastis to entreé or appetizer and le plat principal or main course. Then end with a single or double espresso in a demi tasse with the appropriate demi spoon and some digestif ( alcoholic drinks to help in digestion) .

After that incident,when I set up the table, I do the whole nine yards everyday.I even do folded napkins just for a normal dinner or lunch!I told myself, it wouldln't hurt to retrain my brain that the dining table at home is not all about spoon and fork only. There's a whole set of cutleries waiting to be unleashed not mentioning the flatwares and glasswares. But lo and behold! just the other night, my husband said " I think I'm becoming more Filipino. I don't use my knife that often anymore".

Oh I just laughed and realized, spoon and fork is not so bad at all depending on what you eat and where you eat. I have good lunch and dinner memories in the Philippines with spoon and fork used at the dining table sans the whole hulaballoo. At the end of the day, aside from the meal itself, a happy dine in experience for me will not be complete without the company of friends and loved ones to share the meal with. So I can live without the knife unless of course we have steak to serve ( winks).

Posted by duke at 9/13/2005 11:48:00 AM

32 Comments:

Gayzha said...: Hi Duke... after reading Isay's blog awhile ago and jumping into your blog, i just thought that there is a universal theme going on with Filipino food and their unique ways of eating their food... Yes, we might not have really perfected the art of dining/eating (speaking of the Filipinos in general)... in the eyes of the Westerners and the Europeans, but what we have perfected (somehow) is the joy and warmth of being together (whether family or friends), while eating (dining), beyond the fussiness of it all!!! At the end of the day, what is more important is that our stomach is full and we are all happy together... And I think that that is more important than having all the forks and the knives around you that we forgot the real essence of dining together. I for one just eat with a spoon or with a forkspoon and just one plate especially when we are eating infront of the tv. Cowboy effect but saves time doing the dishes as well.; 9/13/2005 01:01:00 PM
Anonymous said...: Like you, I had to adjust to my husband's fork and knife preference. He cannot imagine how it was possible for us Filipinos to use our spoon to cut our food! :); 9/13/2005 02:03:00 PM
duke said...: This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.; 9/13/2005 02:16:00 PM
duke said...: jhaya- oh so true! that is what I love with eating with Pinoys. The joy of conversations and laugh trips and sharing. Ahhh I used to eat with the spoon alone too! I find it easy! :)

alma- exactly! seems like we have mastered the art of cutting our food with the spoon and fork alone!; 9/13/2005 02:26:00 PM
Anonymous said...: In Pinas, I'm the traditional "Kain tayo". That comfortable feeling you get by eating with your hands, having one foot rest on the chair you're sitting on, and using that bent knee as support/balance for your elbow ar the scene of my folks back in Bicol.

How can I use a fork or spoon to suck the brains out of the bangus head? Mahirap yun ha?

I see fork & spoon very westernized. Pero syempre yung pag may okasyon, dyeta ang ending mo dahil sosyalan kelangan naka fork.

But we pinoys are so intelligent that we can easily adapt to things around us, kahit san ka man pumunta. Now I mastered using a chopstick & eats in a bowl and scoop the rice with the sticks. I said goodbyes to fork & spoon.

LAFANGS!; 9/13/2005 02:46:00 PM
Anonymous said...: nice one. actually, julien and i use chopsticks and bowls in almost every meal (except when we eat steaks etc). first, i find it easier to eat with, and it's easier to clean, too! heheh. have a nice day duke!
-kala; 9/13/2005 03:38:00 PM
Anonymous said...: So Kala is from...? Shes using CHOPSTICK! HK? SINGAPORE? USA-CHINATOWN?

Right, chopstick is more easier to clean saka pang tusok mo na den yun sa mga makukulit na gaya ko. Pwede deng sampayan ng brief yan.

HAHAHA.

O Kain tayo ng salad, gawa ng yaya Jane bumili ako diyan sa Hopewell Center ng frutas sa P&Shop.; 9/13/2005 04:04:00 PM
duke said...: knoizki- I remember back in Pinas, whenever we eat with our hands we end up eating more! our family loves it! lalo na when we go outing in a nearby beach! ahhh what fond memories!

kala- chopsticks are really good to use also! easier na lesser things to clean pa! :); 9/13/2005 04:04:00 PM
Anonymous said...: yup - spoon & fork with pinoy dish; knife & fork for western dish. kamay na lang pag tuyo at sinangag!; 9/13/2005 04:05:00 PM
duke said...: hahah kala is Pinay also but she's living in France!

so you use the same chopstick to hang your undies ? lol!

penge ako ng salad!!!!; 9/13/2005 04:06:00 PM
duke said...: isay- hay naku pag tuyo ang ulam at fried rice for sure kamay ang gagamitin ko! :); 9/13/2005 04:07:00 PM
Anonymous said...: To Isay; Meron na kayong TUYO diyan sa OZ? Malamang napapaluto ka nyan. Ayaw ni Papa G na amoy....?

Oberdabakod ako sa comment kay Isay. Sensya na Duke, ginawa ko tuloy YM ang comment box mo hahaha.

Nalala ko, kelangan bang gumamit ng chopstick sa fruit salad? Kamayin ko kaya? Aguy...; 9/13/2005 04:08:00 PM
duke said...: knoizki- no prob! ay babaric kamayin ba ang salad .. wahahahahahaha aguy talaga!; 9/13/2005 04:11:00 PM
Anonymous said...: I grew up on the spoon and fork combo during the weekdays, Friday adding the knife just for etiquette's practice! Today, if I can get away with it I use a spoon and bowl. My niece, on the other hand, kamayan all the time.; 9/13/2005 04:39:00 PM
Analyse said...: all that resumes to one, sis - bundok bundok na hugasan...and don't forget to wipe each fork and knife plus all the glasses one by one, dapat walang traces ng droplets of water..hayy!

suddenly remembered tuloy one of our expats in pinas when he just arrived there, tanungin ba naman ako how he will cut his viand...isip ko bopols naman nito, e di kutsarain mo, logic no?...pero since mabait ako, i showed him how to cut it with spoon in style nyehehe..; 9/13/2005 08:36:00 PM
Abaniko said...: Usually we eat with our bare hands if the food is "unsouped". Eating becomes enjoyable this way.; 9/13/2005 09:18:00 PM
silentmode_v2 said...: asians use chopsticks, we use spoon and forks, and westerners spoon and knife... but arabs and other south asians use breads (kubos or paratha) by means of eating. different styles ikanga... but i prefer na kumain na nakakamay dahil mas ginaganahan akong kumain... :); 9/13/2005 10:02:00 PM
Anonymous said...: I am married to an American and he too wonders why I prefer a spoon over a knife. He just can't get it. I told him, that is how we do it in the Philippines, at least in our home.

When we eat outside, I adapt to what is the norm, but at home, I do not want to complicate my eating style. He uses fork and knife, while I use the spoon and fork combo. When he is not home, I eat with my fingers!

He really can't say anything because I am very versatile, I can eat using fork/knife, fork/spoon, chopsticks and most especially with my fingers.

Sometimes, I do see him use the spoon. The man is learning. :-); 9/13/2005 10:21:00 PM
duke said...: mare- hear! hear! I was always a spoon and fork girl back then! ;)

mildred-di ba mas nakakagana kumain with barehands?saraaaap! lalao na pag inihaw ang ulam!

ana- hay naku! sinabi mo pa! ang hugasin ko nakakaloka pag complete course ang meal!
bait mo naman! turuan bang hiwain ang ulam with a spoon?! (lol) hmmmnnn.. turuan ko din kaya si hubby?

abaniko- it's always good to eat barehands but for some westerners think we are so "uncultured" doing this ( sigh!)...

silentmode- ay oo nga.. dito rin I see people using their bread as their "spoon and fork" .. different ways talaga.. different cultures...; 9/13/2005 10:24:00 PM
tintin said...: The missing knife is definitely a Filipino thing, if not an Asian thing. Hubby has said the exact same comment looking for the knife that your husband said. Whenever we go to Asian restaurants that are family-owned, the knife is usually missing too.

Anyway, why would we Filipinos need the knife when all we need to do should the meat be too big, too hard, etc. is to use..our hands!!! LOL!; 9/14/2005 01:17:00 AM
JO said...: dito din... i notice that when i ask for a spoon in the restaurant, they look at me as if I'm weird... hehehe...

once, my son ask me "mom, how can i eat my rice without spoon?" So I ask for one and they said they don't have spoons... we were given a dessert spoon intead.; 9/14/2005 02:06:00 AM
Airwind said...: whew!! ako naalala ko tuloy yung mga bakasyon namin ng pamilya ko sa bataan kasi we usually go to the beach taposang dala lang namin e dahon ng saging... walng kobyertos .. tapos magkakamay kami sa handang inihaw na tilapia at inseladang manggang hilaw... uhmmm tsalp tsalap; 9/14/2005 05:48:00 AM
nikki said...: marunong akong gumamit ng chopsticks pero kapag kumakain ako sa mga chinese or japanese restos, spoon & fork pa din ako kasi mas masarap kumain kung gagamit ka ng nakasanayan mo na w/c is spoon & fork.

besides, if you get stranded in an island, san ka maghahanap ng knife dun? mapipilitan din silang magkamay kung gusto nilang hindi magutom. :-D; 9/14/2005 01:35:00 PM
-Teresa- said...: This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.; 9/14/2005 05:51:00 PM
-Teresa- said...: This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.; 9/14/2005 05:52:00 PM
-Teresa- said...: Hi Duke! another one of your refershings posts. I am married to an American and he also eats with fork and knife, something I have adapted into since I moved in the US. I tried teaching him to use spoon especially when eating noodles with sabaw but he is not comfy with it. He still prefers the fork with or without sabaw. I have a nephew who was born here and never been in Pinas, and at 5 years old he asked me, "Auntie, is it true that in the Philippines people wait with spoon and not fork? Gee, don't they know that spoon is for soup?" I think table setting is both cultural and menu dependent and the nice thing with Filipinos is that we can adopt no matter what. But when I eat with my relatives and Filipino friends, spoon and fork is it! Take care! P.S. I apologizee for the deletes, I didn't know how to edit the comment post so I had to delete and re-do it. :-); 9/14/2005 05:54:00 PM
Anonymous said...: sanay talaga ang pinoy sa spoon and fork. ako man feeling ko di ako nabubusog pag nagcha-chopsticks. di rin pati ako sanay gumamit ng knife. hangga't kaya ng powers ko na gamitin ang spoon eh gagawin ko talaga, hehe!

but then again, the best pa rin ang "kamayan", hehe! oh well, depende sa kinakain pati. but pag sa fish, sarap mag-kamay talaga, hehe! ;); 9/14/2005 09:38:00 PM
Anonymous said...: I just watched Filipino stand-up comic Rex Navarrette perform last weekend. When he started talking about how Filipinos are the only people in the world who can cut through anything with their spoons, he got the crowd roaring -- we all identified with his observation. There's just something comforting about eating with only a fork or spoon; pushing food onto my fork using a knife just isn't as much fun. :); 9/15/2005 09:20:00 AM
duke said...: Hi everyone!

thanks for all your comments! It's always good to know that you are not the only one using spoon and fork esp in a different country! ;); 9/15/2005 12:28:00 PM
Anonymous said...: Duke! Thanks for dropping by my site. I just remembered something... I remembered eating at a Filipino restuarant in the Ortigas area and my husband requested for a knife... after 3 minutes, the waiter came back with the rustiest and dustiest looking fork in the restuarant-- after that, he stopped asking for a knife in public places. :); 9/16/2005 04:13:00 AM
celia kusinera said...: hi Duke, the most practical way of eating rice (esp with some thin sauce) is with a shovel aka spoon. Have you tried eating rice, peas, corn kernels with fork and knife? (like lots of people here in Queen E's land) It's a logistical nightmare, isn't it? Ang hirap i-balance ng mga grains sa mga katiting na surface ng fork. Ang standard pa daw ay tines down not up. Nangyayari gutom at gassy stomach ang inaabot ko kasi puro hangin ang naisusubo ko. Harharhar!! :lol:; 9/16/2005 10:41:00 PM
Dr. Emer said...: when i was in hong kong months ago, i asked for spoon and fork in a resto. you know what they gave me? a cup of coffee

?????????

'beats me why they did that.; 9/16/2005 11:26:00 PM

Confessions of an Expat's Wife

September 13, 2005

Spoon and Fork Please!

32 Comments:

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